Life is like a river. Peer at the water. Observe the current. It presents as calm and peaceful. Logs, leaves, ducks floating gently downstream. The river is moving, heading somewhere. The river is traveling towards its destination, its end.
Like the river, most of us are traveling. Traveling towards our own personal ends. Daily life flows forward, smoothly. Generally, without many fits and starts. We wake, work, return home, eat, sleep, repeat. Our lives are gently coasting, like a duck floating down a river.
But beneath the river’s surface other forces are at work. Counter currents and swirls, shallow patches, huge rocks, sinkholes. These other forces are hidden. These obstacles are out of sight. When encountered, they are quite a shock. One day our lives are gently floating downstream, the next they are abruptly capsized. This is the way of nature, the way of life.
Your Bandit recently found himself capsized. What to do, oh readers, what to do? Sink? Allow a huge hidden rock to impede progress? Get caught in a counter current and forever hold still? No! Heavens NO! It was a moment of crisis. Your Bandit knew what to do and turned to the ever faithful refuge of a heavy, hard sphere, hurtling towards pins: bowling.
Action Lanes is an absurd juxtaposition of style, color, atmosphere, and vibe. It is like entering an ultramodern glass and steel home only to find it decorated with paisley 1950s furniture, each piece covered with clear protective plastic, grandma’s loving touch still intact. What you see on the outside of Action Lanes is not what you find within.
Outside you find the ubiquitous So-Cal stucco exterior situated in the tried-and-true Angeleno strip mall aesthetic. While the outside is old stucco, inside you find bright updated lanes, new ball returns, a stocked Pro-Shop, lockers, and other bowling amenities. Bandit takes in the 31 lanes, grabs a $3 bud from the bar, and gets rolling. Off-peak games run $2.50 a pop, very affordable.
Action Lanes sports the traditional setup of most updated alleys, the ball and pins theme, this time around rendered in hues of pink and green. One unique touch is the ball return, composed of all metal framing, lending a futuristic, ski-lift look and feel.
The Cure’s “Just Like Heaven” floats over the speakers, followed by Michael Bridge’s “Cliffs of Dover”, then some Clapton, and the music selection degrades from there. Perhaps the 80s jams are for the crowd, composed almost entirely of elderly bowlers. It is late Sunday afternoon, which turns out to be senior league night. An announcement of a potluck league dinner for the coming Christmas holiday echos over the public address system. A senior bowling league? Bandit imagines his future and immediately recognizes the wisdom of self-help gurus who exhort the virtues of “staying in the present”.
Beyond the mix of seniors a smattering of Latinos and Asians mingle throughout the alley. One group is deep in concentration, playing a card game about eight people deep. Clearly, wagers are on the line. The fast-paced game is generating lots of excitement.
A conversation with the amicable staff at the Pro Shop reveals that the outside surface (known as the coverstock) of bowling balls used to be rubber, while newer balls are now made of polyester (plastic), urethane, or reactive resin. Reactive resin being popular among professional bowlers because of its porous characteristic allowing for more “grip” and therefore more hook. Re-drilling finger holes at the Action Lanes Pro Shop runs around $50.
The tally on Action Lanes, a friendly, well-kept alley, family atmosphere, and an extremely relaxing bowling experience. If Grandma ever says, “let’s go bowling” this is the place to take her. Hopefully, on Sunday night, so she can mingle with other retirees chucking rocks.
10534 Lower Azusa Road
El Monte, CA 91731
(626) 350-8831
